"He's got the whole world in His Hands, He's got you and me brother in His Hands; He's got you and me sister in His Hands" - It's been a long time since I sang or even recalled this song; of which I sang often in my youth. Back then it was pleasurable to sing it, and it seemed everyone knew it. Kinda like "Take me out to the Ballgame, take me out...."
Jingles, songs, hymms no matter what catogory they fall under, it's melodies which brought a smile followed with my heart feeling warm inside. Being brought up Catholic no doubt this tune had an added meaning, and I would picture in my mind, how really big the Lords Hands must be in order to hold everyone in the World in His Hands, but that thought was hard to imagine and so instead I concentrated on the fact that I was in His Hands, plus all members of my family.
Now however, as I sung this tune....it represented a greater meaning, in which I noted that when I was young, "yes, He held me gently in His Hand. However, through the years of my becoming older, and exposed to the worldly aspects of wanting a career, earning more money, and becoming a wife plus mother; I wanted it all, being Superwoman was not an issue in modern time. I didn't stop til I reached all the above, plus after gaining all that, I wasn't satisfied, and so I justified more, even if it meant jumping out of Jesus' Hand.
Free Will empowers me to have a choice, plus freedom to go out and make my dreams come true. Plus accomplish my wants//wishes which will no doubt would make me so important including bringing me success, a six figure income, and extra money to be able to get me the things I couldn't have because we were too poor. So yep, I wanted all the more, cause of my youthly poor conditions,. I didn't rob or kill anyone, I at least worked my way up the ladder and put in my dues to get it. Nothing wrong with that, right? Wrong, as I look back and realize that foolishly I gave up my true Love, my Comforter, my Lord, because He wasn't attending to my immediate wants, and afterall, I was sure I could get it much rapidly than Jesus.
The marketing TV Slogans in advertisements didn't help....DO IT NOW! IT'S EXPENSIVE, BUT I AM WORTH IT! ETC.... along with The New Age movement, I can have it all....reach the Top.....become my own god!!!! YES WHY NOT???
VANITY.....ALL PURELY VANITY.....Satisfaction isn't guaranteed once one reaches the top. Whether one is a Top In demand Movie Star, or just a middle class broad..my song soon became "I can't get no satisfaction" but I continued looking and seeking out all the wrong places in order to reach that Satisfaction Peace Platue....LOL....
UNTIL the tune rang in my brain...."I HAVE NO WHERE TO RUN TOO, BABY, NO WHERE TO HIDE!" Which I finally Landed on my face.... and it was becoming clear that, "yes, all isVanity."
But let me tell you about the greatest disgrace of all....once I hit rock bottom, cause I got so tired of chasing after a never ending rainbow which the several pot of gold wasn't enough, and I became so sick of it all, that checking out was becoming appealing to me, but I was a coward and the fear of God was beginning to take a grip. Thank God.
I had the nerve to call myself a Christian when my actions and walk were not lined up. Everyone saw but me as I disgraced His Name while I was supposably speaking so religiously holy. I am ashame to have hurt and break my Lord's heart; after all He never abandoned me, He Loves me Unconditionally and He patiently waited for my return. Oh the shame I displayed openly while believing I was so Good when in reality I was believing the slander and lies Satan was feeding my ego!
It sickens me even now as I write my testimony. How truly Ugly I became.
Becoming a Prodical Child, but Thank God my Mother did...."Teach the children in the way they should go, so when they grow older and forget, that their rememberance may reappear to them, so they will choose coming back home to the Lord".
No doubt, that somehow, I had a quarter of a mustard seed still in my soul and it was still rooted within me by Faith. AND THANK JESUS for supernaturally helping me to recall, that He nor Satan could remove it, and that tiny tee-nee mustard seed burn back memories of His Love for me, and my Love for Him, as I layed in my own pig pen filled with mud throughout every part of my body.
I finally was so sick of myself, that somehow I managed to cry out "My Lord my God, Jesus, Forgive Me, I surrender all of me back to you!" And with three suitcases in my hand, i relocated to the desert and gave up everything, AND everyone....HE'S WORTH THIS AND MORE....
This is why, He, Jesus is my Reason for Living, and I daily commit to His being my Lord and Savior for eternity to be with Him. My true Hearts only desire. For what does it mean for me to gain the whole world, if to Lose My Soul, and My Lord Jesus Christ. He is my total Satisfaction, my True Peacemaker whose Promises are Guaranteed.
I've rededicated myself to Jesus Christ, re born declaring Him my Lord and Saviro and from this time forth until it's my time to die, I will profess and follow Him, Professing Him to Be The Father's Only Son, who died for my sins, and was resurrected on the third day, and sits on the Right Hand of the Father, He shall come a final time, and Hell will be the permanent nightmare home for all eternity to rot with satan and his demonic team members.
Please search, seek out Jesus Christ for your selves, before it is too late, for He stands at your Heart door, knocking to be let in. The choice is yours, and yours alone, because our Lord, Our Father, gave to all....Free Will. For we don't know if there will be a tomorrow, or we will be around in an hour, let alone Jesus' final coming is unknown. It's eternity I'm talking about.....JESUS or Satan....who's camp do you want to reside with? Forget about religion, this is a choice and a devotion to one or the other. Just because you consider yourself a Good Person, do you understand the definition of what it is to commit and surrender to God's ways, or Satan? Do you know that you know, if not, or not sure, challenge yourself to find out... the sooner the better, I hope you do?